All Brooklyn Nine-Nine Heists And Winners

Brooklyn Nine-Nine just completed its final season, and I was left with a void in my heart, as most fans would. Saying goodbye to your favorite TV characters is never easy, especially when they are so cool cool cool.

The finale was a two-part episode, and it was the final heist. I mean, they had to end with it, now wouldn’t they. Perhaps one of the most brilliant ways to tie in nostalgia while also ensuring that the narrative doesn’t succumb to the cliche finale tropes. There was drama, there was action, and just way too many surprise reveals. Like many…

After the finale, I realized what I wanted.*drum roll*  A Grand Heist Winner. By that, I don’t mean a person but a heist itself. Which Halloween Heist throughout the 8 seasons will be titled the Grand Champion of heists?

Here’s a list of all Brooklyn Nine-Nine heists and winners, ranked!

8. It’s Not Detective/Genius It’s Human/Genius

B99 has its own way of talking about inclusivity, even if it’s through heists. Gina Linetti managed to outwit everyone (which she could’ve any day she wanted) to prove that not just detective but anybody could participate in the heist. And thus born was the title Amazing Human/Genius.

My favorite part of the episode was Gina’s teeth or the lack of them. It was indeed a jaw-dropping victory. #PunIntended

7. The One Where Amy Doesn’t Get Selected

Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Jake Announces the Halloween Battle (Episode Highlight)

When you’re stuck between the pride of Holt and Peralta, there’s only one way to teach them a lesson. She exposed Jake’s lack of stamina (#TitleOfAmyAndJake’sSexTape) by making him climb multiple floors and made him vomit. A small price to pay when you underestimate an amazing detective now Chief/Genius.

6. One Last Heist

Hitchcock Wins The Final Heist / Jake’s Goodbye Speech | Brooklyn 99 Season 8 Episode 10

Meep morp… Zeet. Pimento’s back. Gina’s back with her ‘thurprithe reveals,’ and of course, Hitchcock is not only back but even the winner of the last day heist. Well, not the winner we all would’ve wanted, but Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s known for some of its off-beat endings.

The trip down memory lane was too emotional and perhaps even a little funny as the squad of noine noine embarked on their last adventure. I know it’s in the top 5, but that’s because it makes me sad, and that’s not what heists are about. 

Also, if you think about it, Bill was the grand champion, and he just sold it to Hitchcock. Guess everyone, in one way or another, is part of the noine-noine.

5. The Proposal Heist

Where are you all Peraltiago fans at? Now I know the debate about who won the fifth heist is never-ending, but for all those hopeless romantics, let’s declare Amy and Jake as the winners. But it wasn’t just about the proposal.

Just from the planning perspective, this heist was perhaps Jake’s most fail-proof plan, save Bill. Even the first time he won, it began with him breaking through the ceiling and not in a good way.

If you’re wondering, is that it? Duh no! Terry moves a giant server, and no, not virtually. Holt moves a giant server without even touching it. Oh, there’s also an homage to one of the best shows in recent times, The Handmaid’s Tale. If you recognize the show, special respect for your taste in TV series.

4. Terry Turns Gold

Terry not only has a golden heart, but he also has a golden body. If you don’t remember him in golden paint, you just forgot one of the hilarious heist moments. I think Terry winning the heist was pretty sweet, so Terry.

He managed to pit everyone against each other and came out right on top. Guess he knew everyone that well, and I think we should all have seen how that’s excellent quality for any captain to have.

By the heist announcements at the beginning of this heist are probably the best. They set the tone of how everyone’s going to be pompous, outwitting each other at every turn, and end up making us laugh our hearts out.

3. The Three-Time Winning Champion

If anyone could have done it, it was Rosa. Silent but lethal, Rosa Diaz won the heist at every turn, and honestly, her planning abilities are way better than the rest of the nine-nine squad. The heist that took place across Halloween, Valentine’s Day, and Easter seemed like an endless ride of surprise reveals, twists, and madness.

But here’s the best part about this heist episode. Right from the get-go, we all know Halloween heist is happening, but Rosa calls out that they’ve done it five times. So it’s not only repetitive but nothing new to explore. The humor’s meta, and it isn’t even off character for Rosa to act like a buzzkill.

This definitely makes it to the top three.

2. Holt Has His Day Of Vengeance

Long before Batman was vengeance (#NewBatmanRef), Captain Holt was the best living symbol of the word. This heist is way too special because, despite the familiar tropes we see in redemption arcs, the episode fractured our funny bones as the laughter hurt our stomachs.

This was also one of the first times we see Holt being his competitive self, which doesn’t mince words, literary metaphors, and off-beat references. All this while tearing his enemy apart, who in this case was Jake.

1. Jake Peralta – An Amazing Detective/Genius

Halloween Heist one is the best. Jake Peralta convinces the entire precinct to work with him and become to defeat Captain Raymond Holt, become the winner, and bag the title of Amazing Detective/Genius.

No, Halloween one is not the best because it was the first of its kind, but it legit felt like the perfect heist with a comedic undertone. Everything, right from the initiation of the challenge (the setup), the repeated failures (the conflict), and the final OG surprise reveal (the resolution), was just perfectly written.

I think more than anything, one of my favorite heist moments across all seasons is in this episode. When Jake is handcuffed and tries to reach out for Captain’s hand, he falls and shouts Woohoo! I think that emotion of getting the high of winning and successfully pulling off the perfect crime cannot be articulated in any other way.

Did I say perfect way too many times? Duh, yeah, because it was.

Why don’t you rewatch all the heist episodes? ‘cause I’m about to do exactly that. Go noine noine!

About Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Brooklyn Nine-Nine is an American police procedural comedy television series created by Dan Goor and Michael Schur.

The show stars Andy Samberg as Jake Peralta, Stephanie Beatriz as Rosa Diaz, Terry Crews as Terry Jeffords, Melissa Fumero as Amy Santiago, Joe Lo Truglio as Charles Boyle, Chelsea Peretti as Gina Linetti, Andre Braugher as Captain Holt, Dirk Blocker as Michael Hitchcock, and Joel McKinnon Miller as Norm Scully.

Braugher has been nominated four times for the Primetime Emmy Award and has twice won the Critics’ Choice Television Award. The show has also received a GLAAD Media Award for Outstanding Comedy Series portrayal of LGBTQ+ people.

The series revolves around Jake Peralta, a talented but immature NYPD detective in Brooklyn’s fictional 99th Precinct, who often comes into conflict with his commanding officer, the serious and stern Captain Raymond Holt.